I am at home. On my sofa, laptop on my lap with a cat hanging on my arm. The sun is going down but I cannot get up to close the curtains or switch the lights on. I don’t want to disturb her. The glow from my screen lights my face an my surroundings become gloomier and gloomier.
Very different from the inspiring romance of the small desert villages. Less vibrant. I feel detached.
Now - all these promises from inspiring conversation and the hopeful eyes and hearts of all those that I spoke with, was inspired by and dreaming ideas.
Now, make it happen.
Do it now.
How am I going to do that.
I sketch around in my note books… I dream new ideas… ideas are not the problem, the doing the making, conjuring something up from nothing… nowhere…
How will I find people? How will I finance it? Can I do this - feelings of dread and uncertainty surround me.
I talk on the phone with Allal - he is wild and creative and unstructured and bounding with energy.
I am going to have to form a structure here?
I start from what I know. Isn’t it all we can do?
How am I going to shape this into something.
I am a total fraud - who was I thinking that I could do this… i’ve never done it… how hard can it be?
I start to build content - like I would for a website - gathering material… images, creative copy, form a structure of the site - post it notes come out.
Then - God, how do you make an organisation?…. we need a company structure - research on CIC, Charities.
Build the site - if you build it they will come, social media, start my standard method of making plan for communications / marketing etc. but I’m building in sand… nothing exists…
What I do have is a space in a country where I don’t know the language, Idon’t know the legalities, Idon’tknow if they want it, Idon’tknowwhat the impact will be, Idon’tknowhowIwill fund it Idon’tknowhowIwillfindthetimetodeliverit…
but still I carry on.
I cannot stop.
This process has opened me up, to trust the next step…
Make it, learn from failure. (IDEO 2015)